P.O.W.: “Days Like This” by DeAnna Collins

August 4, 2009 § Leave a comment

after a short hiatus.. one of our best PremierePoet’s have returned. with yet another awesome awesome piece…soo with the comeback I give the Poem of the Week too, DeAnna C.

enjoy.

“On Days Like This”

On days like this….when the sun meets the horizon just right
and the world looks beautiful
I swear i can see him

I remember his face like it was a fresh memory
Instead of what it was…
old tattered and what should be long forgotten
The contours and lines of it i could map out in my sleep
with out misplacing a dimple
or those laugh lines he gets even when he speaks
cuz see i knew that face

Had it memorized before anyone else took the time to notice it
Cuz see to me
that was it
I saw it
i saw him
Before you could even fathom what he was
what he could mean
what he would mean
past your silly expectations of him
or what you thought he should have been
I saw the potential
where as your vision
even the best corrective glasses couldn’t have fixed
but you were so sure you could fix him
even though nothing was broken

I remember his eyes like they were windows open to a view that was beyond beautiful
He saw everything and everyone for who they were
Most of yall couldn’t see past the shades
but I…..I was his bestfriend
the girl he pretended to date all through middle school
Just so the other boys wouldn’t think he was gay
Even though we all knew he was lol
He tried so hard to live up to everyone else’s expectations of him

But see thats were bestfriends are different
We dont care what you are
We just care that every min your around us you are exactly who you are
and you never try to be anything else
cuz thats when things get complicated
he’d swap out girl talk
ith having sex with girls
and shopping Saturdays
with Christian clinics
that claimed they could make him a lil less him
and a lil more god like
whatever that meant
i thought go liked everyone

But because he liked boys
i guess he doesn’t qualify for the same right s as i do
looking for a job?
“he better apply for a hairdresser or a fashion designer
…you know something those gays do”
Heh, right
and see its shit like that that make me lose my best friend
stupid ideologies
mixed with bad opinions
brought his life to an end even before it had started
and see theres no sorry
theres no going back
now ya feel bad that hes dead
say yall never saw it coming

But you saw it coming
you knew exactly what you were doing
from the moment you pushed him down on the ground and beat him till he bled
threw dir in his face and called him a fag
since they stole his stuff in the process
they didnt call it gay bashing
the cops called it robbery instead
cuz thats alot easier to explain on a college campus
even though the psychological damage is clearly different

He didnt get attacked because he was alone
because he was vulnerable
or even because he was in the wrong neighborhood
he got attacked because of who he slept with
the football player that led him on
made him think he was in love
but the second he took it to far ha, ha
things….got….complicated
and the bruises yall left
scared deeper then you thought
and since he knew yall would never let him live his life the way he wanted
he ended it
And its been 4 years since i found him in his room…bottle in hand
But im telling you…on days like this.. i swear i remember his face like it was a fesh memory
Instead of what it is

NUNU

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